This one is for keeps cos i love him and he loves me!

      He came to me as a farewell gift from my aunt in class four when i was just leaving a familiar territory into an unfamiliar one. That's what happens to you if your dad works in a transferable job! Sigh! Anyway, i was all sad and miserable for having to leave back my school, my friends, my relatives, my soul-sister, my place! And just an hour before leaving, i get this gift which brings a smile on my sullen face.I am not allowed to open it immediately cos it's late. You can imagine what it is to have a wrapped gift in your hand and not be able to open it. More sobs! So my aunt decides to tell me what is in it. She tells me its a teddy bear! My my! The joy i felt cannot be explained in words. I couldn't wait to climb the bus and reach the destination just so that i could open it up. Hehe.. The wonders a teddy bear can do to you!

     Teddy bears.... Brings a smile on almost every girl's face, lil or grown up! These soft cuddly lil toys actually play such an important role in my life. I wouldn't call em toys. Nope! Cos teddies n me go way too far. I can proudly say i stil have my first ever teddy bear with me and all of those which followed. I love all of them so much, but there's always a favorite. ;-)

    The bus purred away, and i couldnt get my eyes off the box and finally dad laughs at me and tells me i can open it up if i cant wait until the morning. (Oh he knew i couldn't catch a single wink of sleep until i saw it :-P) Bless him! I tear open the wrappings, lo and behold...This box has a transparent side to it. And that's when i caught the first glimpse of what was going to accompany me for times to come, as my best friend.

    He(Yeah! I somehow felt it was a 'beary boy'.. I have no clue why!) looked back at me with those beautiful brown eyes. I had a sudden urge to kiss his pretty lil pink nose. He was a lemon-yellow furry lil bear with a green ribbon. Satisfied with what i saw i finally look out of the window into the cold dark night, breeze hitting my face. A thing of beauty is joy forever? So true... I stared out into nothingness and all of a sudden i wake up mom dad. There's an emergency situation!

    They look at me concerned, cos they know what i am going through with all the change happening. I tell them my emergency concern of the moment and they look at each other, burst out laughing. And i look back with disbelief and anger. Dont they understand...? I HAVE TO NAME MY NEW TEDDY BEAR! They try telling me that this christening ceremony can wait till we move into our new home. But i was deaf-ears. They slipped back into sleep while i put my thinking cap on! I had to name him and it had to end with an 'ee' sound.(I always had an inclination to name all my toys ending with an 'ee'.. pinky, dolly, beauty, baby, teddy, bunny...) Should i call him sweety? Yellowy? Yelly? Lemony?

    And then it came to me with a rush of excitement, and it felt soooo right! CUTIE... :) The name felt familiar already. Lil did i know how connected i was going to be to this name in the times to come. Being a single kid, Cutie has played innumerous roles in my life- my sibling, my secret-keeper, my huggy friend, my bedtime-pal and my best friend. It's old, faded and weak now. But this old wise fellow is for keeps cos i love him and he loves me. So that was it, content and relief swept over as i drifted to a happy sleep hugging on to my Cutie pie. I wasn't alone anymore!

Cutie is my teddy bear

Which is very fair.

He has yellow hair

And a small tail.

He has two eyes

Which look very nice.

He has white toes

And a pink nose.

He has two ears

Which very well hears.

He has a bow green

And he is very clean.

For me he is dearest

And for all he is cutest.

                                            -Written by fourth class Pranita! ;-)

Your inner voice is calling, calling you!

Make God your guru,
Let him tell you what to do,
Listen! He is calling, calling you!
Take time to listen, have courage to obey,
The inner voice is calling, calling you.
There are voices all around us,
That of enemies and of friends,
Do this, don't do that, the chorus never ends.
But I shall always listen, to that quiet inner voice,
It is still and definite, and I've made my choice.
Make God your guru,
Let him tell you what to do,
Listen! He is calling, calling you!
Take time to listen, have courage to obey,
The inner voice is calling, calling you.

      It just came to me today, the prayer from my class one which i uttered everyday till class three, not really knowing what it meant.(Ok..There's a huuuuge list of what i did, not really knowing what it meant, someday it ll make sense?!) I ve recalled it a few more times ever since, understanding it a little more each time. But today i think i can finally say I KNOW what it means, word to word! I think there's a reason why this prayer always stuck in my head. I think there's a reason why this is the only prayer i remember by HEART without ever making conscious efforts. I think there's a reason why i remembered it right now. I just know it...

      The message behind it is so simple. Always do what your inner voice tells you to. No one can deny there's a voice inside us which keeps telling us the right thing to do.But we somehow let our friends, our enemies, the society influence our decisions! Sometimes the influence is good too.. but in those times your inner voice will tell you its a good influence! It never lies, always loves.

      We do not listen to it cos we are scared to admit to ourselves that we are not on the right path. Gradually the voice fades away. It doesn't die, but it loses it's voice. Do not let your inner voice die. 'Take time to listen and have courage to obey'. Doing what our inner voice tells us to is the most difficult thing in today's world. Inspite of that, if we show courage and obey it, I am sure the rewards will be sweet. Why do something for the people who don't really care? Instead do something for the people who love you, whom you love and for US!

      Mayb some time in future, i'll find another hidden meaning to it which i fail to see now. Nevertheless, I hereby declare this prayer as my favorite prayer. I wish it continues unravelling its beauty and its secrets always, bestowing its blessings on me till the end, making me wiser and stronger. I pray God that he give me enough wisdom that i travel this journey of life in such a way that on my last day on earth, i can happily say, "I know everything this prayer had in store for me". Amen!

I believe in....?

Okies people... oops! I dont think anyone even reads this... anyway... long time since i came blogging.... Doesn't really make a difference to anyone but ME... Hmmm... I was wondering what is it about life that makes it sooo unpredictable.... seriously...!!! Things change within the blink of an eye!

One thing i have realised today, that is when u believe in something, believe in it completely..... Come what may... If you put all your heart and work towards something good, the result can never be bad... The universe will make sure you achieve it... Life is about being positive and believing strongly.... It's about giving without expecting in return... When we do good and expect returns, it doesn't make us happy.... Expectations are killers... Jus give and do not expect... Your karma will take care of you... All the troubles and sadness you face are the results of your own wrong-doings... All the joy and happiness you get are the result of our good selfless deeds... Only your karma decides in what proportions you get it..!

Do good and leave it to God... Most people live in the misconception that good deeds are rewarded immediately... We need to realise that if we do good, we surely get good in return, but may not be in the form we expect it to be.. Because God alone knows what is really good for us...! A change in a person is always gradual....it can never be seen overnight... We make up our mind to change, and feel the necessity to be noticed... But when we change truly, it need not be told, for it will be seen..!

I realised one more thing today.... Today we live in such a quick world.... Where results are got in less than seconds time... This has psychologically moulded our minds such that if we make up our mind to do something good in order to achieve something... we expect the results instantly... We need to realise that nature takes its own sweet time to give you when you deserve it... So never stop but go on... Never stop believing in something if you really believe in it from the bottom of your heart! Perseverance with a good intention can attain anything...!

When you love someone, love like how your mother loves you... Selfless and true....! A mother will never lie about her love to her children... She is lying only if she says she doesn't love you! Love with your doors open... Because true love is one in which you don't need walls but only doors... If it goes out of one door, it wil surely return from another...Because true love lies in your heart... And to keep someone in your heart, you need no walls...!


Believing in miracles like never before.....! I know it'l happen....!

I want OUT of this....!

       Haven't written for long.... not outta touch though! Recently i ve been wondering a lot about my future.. N the confusion is frustrating me to the core... M confused like i have never ever been before! I wish i had never grown up... What was i even thinking as a kid when i wanted to be a BIG GIRL...! How stress-free those days were... Good old days!

       Presently the reason why i am so fondly remembering childhood is coz right now m at a loss o my wits... I'm scared about the decisions i need to make about my life... The decisions which are gonna shape my future... As kids, our toughest choices were limited to the kinda clothes we wanted to buy, or the choice of food in a hotel... As we grew, we somehow never had to make the big decisions of life... Our parents made it, or our stereo-typical society led us to those...

       I have realized that the social perceptions of future for a girl has brought me to the junction where i presently am... But what next...? I have no clue... All of a sudden i find no people to make decisions for me... It's up to me what i want to become... It's upto me how i see myself from now on... But what should i do when i don't see it... What should i do when i can't decide what's right for me and what not... what can i do when every person's opinions seems right... what should i do???!!!! 

       I look at some people with awe who know what they want... It's all planned... And it frustrates me all the more and i am inclined to make the decision of my life soon... The more i make a firm mind about a choice, the other one seems a lil more appealing... I jump to the later, and the former seems right again... I want OUT of this situation which is driving me crazy...!!! This is high time and my mind is a whirlwind of choices, and tough decisions... I have to act, act fast, act NOW.. before it's too late to decide....! 

       But yet again... i wish a miracle happens that shows me the right way... The way that's gonna help my bud blossom into a thing of beauty and get me joy forever... I wish i really knew what i wanted outta life... I wish... i wish...!

       Waiting for this big miracle.... waiting for that sign which will take me to my written destiny..... Then again they say, We become what we think of the most.... But what will i become when i see many versions of 'me' which don't seem to get along together...! Hoping for peace, praying God for a decision-making miracle....! Tathastu....!

The man in the mirror...!

       For some reason today i feel, if i followed half the things i truly feel, with complete faith and perseverance i'll make a great human being! There's so much of a difference between saying, feeling and doing. What's the whole point of saying something you don't feel??? Once you realize that, what's the whole point in feeling something you don't put into actions??? I realized there is soooo much of a difference in 'knowing' what is right and 'doing' the right thing! There are many people who live an ignorant life, not able to understand the right thing in life. Then there are those who know what is right, but spend time only knowing more but not really implementing each of them! The REAL heroes are those who diligently practice what they preach!

       I just came across this song by Michael Jackson, 'Man in the mirror'. The lyrics of this song refreshed my desire to do right!

I'm starting with the Man in the mirror,
I'm asking Him to change His ways,
And no message could have been any clearer-
"If you wanna make the World a better place,
 Take a look at yourself, and then make a Change!"

       I've always believed no one is perfect. Being in the constant process of changing yourself is what leads you to near-perfection! As we've heard CHARITY BEGINS AT HOME. On similar grounds, if you want to change the world, then first take a look at yourself and make the change. Who can be a better first volunteer than yourself...!
       This world when looked through magical eyes, is such a wonderful place to live in. We are so lucky just to be born as humans and not just any unicellular creature. Why not live a life with that happy quotient. Things change, circumstances change, but don't let that change what you really feel deep down inside. Everytime i muse, i go look at the mirror. The person looking back there is the only one who knows you inside out. That is one person who won't lie to you, who doesn't think twice telling something on your face. But most of us try pretending we can't hear the inner voice which is always guiding us to do right. Why not give some time to the real YOU...!?
        So go on....! Look into that mirror, use those beautiful eyes to look into the inner YOU, shut those ears for the outside world for a moment, and listen to the soothing inner voice calling you....! Musing over this note i sign off, saying what i always say..... "Miracles Happen!" :)