Saturday, June 30, 2012

Dew drops of the dawn.




Sings old nightingale
Ancient myth shines through darkness
Truth in melody
~
Bosom of the loved
True feelings rush to form tears
Smiles hidden beneath
~
Dew drops of the dawn
Crystal lumps of happiness
Truly shapes your day


Here is my attempt to be more true to the Haiku rules as suggested by LEO. I appreciate his effort in helping us truly understand the concept behind this beautiful form of poetry. The three set of haiku today are not a chain, but only related through the concept of 'TRUE'. Expecting your true feedbacks. That will be much appreciated! :)

This Haiku is written for the Haiku Heights. The prompt for the week is 'TRUE'.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Longing luscious hair
Dreaming the beautiful life
Make peace with the Dove
 
Read my entry for the DOVE contest hosted on IndiBlogger --> How Dove nourished my Soul..!
Vote for me if you like it here.


Posted by at
Labels: ,

37 comments:

  1. NAWALJune 30, 2012 at 5:28 PM

    Each set is beautifully penned... the word TRUE is the most used in your post this week ;D loved reading it... as fresh as drops of dew :) your blog shapes my vision anyhow :)

    P.S I'm lovin the fact I am the first to comment!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. PranitaJune 30, 2012 at 6:01 PM

      Thanks a lot Maharukh! :) M glad ur d first one too... a true heart always shows! As is yours! :)

      Delete
  2. GraceJune 30, 2012 at 6:27 PM

    A nice improvement in your haiku writing ~ A single image to write about is great like the bosom of the beloved and dew drops of dawn ~ What would really work too is too avoid using sweeping words like happiness and truth ~ Use instead a vivid image to show an example of it, and contrast or complement it in the third line like this:

    Dew drops of the dawn
    crystals soft on vase of blooms,
    salt on native tongue

    Native tongue is used to denote being true to oneself ~ Hope you don't mind my heartfelt feedback ~

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. PranitaJuly 1, 2012 at 12:09 AM

      That was soooo very insightful Grace.. Appreciate ur effort to make me better... Thank u so much... It would be gr8 if u kept suggesting/correcting... i love the learning experience... it makes the journey al d more special.. Thank you Grace :)

      Delete
  3. carol l mckennaJune 30, 2012 at 6:38 PM

    Wonderful haiku ~ always penned well ~ love the ...crystal lumps of happiness, lovely line ~~ thanks, ^_^ (A Creative Harbor)

    ReplyDelete
  4. rallentandaJune 30, 2012 at 7:02 PM

    Your last haiku is beautiful...I could use some crystal lumps of happiness at the moment:)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. PranitaJuly 1, 2012 at 12:03 AM

      Hehe... Sending loads of lumps ur way! :) Thank u so much!

      Delete
  5. TigerbriteJune 30, 2012 at 7:31 PM

    These are lovely :)

    ReplyDelete
  6. joanneJune 30, 2012 at 8:38 PM

    Yes, send me a lump of happiness too....all your works are so well-crafted....

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. PranitaJuly 1, 2012 at 12:04 AM

      On your way Joanne! :D Thank u so much... These comments make my day!

      Delete
  7. Sankara Jayanth SJune 30, 2012 at 9:45 PM

    Wonderful. Loved all of them. Pleasant and calmly suffuses the message into heads and hearts.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sankara Jayanth SJune 30, 2012 at 10:05 PM

      And the daisy? is it daisy? Its beautiful.

      Delete
    2. PranitaJuly 1, 2012 at 12:06 AM

      Thanks a lot Jayanth! Yes... i definitely think that's a daisy! :)

      Delete
  8. Tarang SinhaJune 30, 2012 at 10:25 PM

    Lovely words and beautiful picture!:)

    ReplyDelete
  9. Jaideep RaoJuly 1, 2012 at 1:16 AM

    Liked first and last, bit confused with second, I would like to know more on it!

    ReplyDelete
  10. Vivian DeloresJuly 1, 2012 at 2:37 AM

    Awesome Haiku! You are so good at this.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. PranitaJuly 1, 2012 at 12:27 PM

      Aww... Thanks a lot Susan.. Ur too kind! :)

      Delete
  11. Tarun MazumdarJuly 1, 2012 at 10:03 AM

    crystal lumps of happiness... beautiful lines... you were indeed true to the form...

    http://chaigaramchai.blogspot.in/2012/06/true-haiku-jule-1-2012.html

    ReplyDelete
  12. Sri ValliJuly 1, 2012 at 3:20 PM

    Beautiful set...and I loved the first one...esp the line...'Truth in melody'..

    ReplyDelete
  13. Bruce MillerJuly 1, 2012 at 8:30 PM

    Beautiful haiku set on love, truth and feelings!!

    ReplyDelete
  14. Clare FlourishJuly 1, 2012 at 9:36 PM

    The lakes at sunrise
    The river and waterfowl
    Perfect by themselves

    ReplyDelete
  15. ChèvrefeuilleJuly 2, 2012 at 12:51 AM

    A good attempt to write in the classical 5-7-5 form. Love the way in which you have used the prompt TRUE. Thank you so much for sharing.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Amrit SinhaJuly 5, 2012 at 1:27 AM

    Crystal lumps of happiness - reminded me of sugar crystals ... and an equally sweet haiku :-)

    ReplyDelete
  17. kaykualaJuly 5, 2012 at 8:04 PM

    Truthfully blessed,great haiku set Pranita!

    Hank

    ReplyDelete
  18. AnonymousJuly 5, 2012 at 11:01 PM

    VERY nice!!! Better and better!!! :)

    ReplyDelete

Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom)