(Chug) I could see dad's face (Chug chug) floating out of my sight as the train chugged, gaining pace (chug chug chug chug)..... A moment is all it took for him to be OUT of sight and IN my thoughts...Only moments before, he sat next to Me and Mom making sure all the luggage was safely chained. No sooner was he satisfied by the luggage safety, he eyed the male passengers around and i couldn't help but smile to myself. For i knew what would run in his mind, the next few minutes.
A young, handsome boy would set his minds racing to the AGE-effect... and an older, bulky, moustachy, rogue man would set him wishing he himself had come along with us, or wish that there was atleast a single lady passenger around, apart from the two lovely women of his life. He'll try and judge them, but No, how can they be nice!
"Why is that man lookin down to the luggage, is he gonna steal..?! Why is the guy looking at my daughter.. Why can't he mind his own business...?! I think He needs to be given a piece of my mind...! You better keep your thoughts to yourself mister...!! You harm them, and you're dead meat...!" A LOL moment to me and an AAAARGH to him! Haha..
As i saw him fighting his urge to unchain the luggage and get us out of the train and take us back home with him, the bogie was filling up with the last-minute people hurrying around, forcing dad to get out of the train. Within seconds, his face pops up at the window. He seems happy there is a charging point in the compartment and asks me to check to see if its working. It surprisingly did.. So then started the instructions... (Take a deep breath)
"DO NOT switch off your mobile phones... Keep it charged... Keep giving me missed calls now and then... Call me when you stop at stations... Make sure you have all your luggage when you get down... Should i ask one of these men to help you with the luggage...? Do not forget to keep an alarm... You won't miss the station right? Keep your handbags under your head... Don't go to the washroom alone at night... Do you need anything...? U have water and some food for emergency...? Do u need a magazine... Do u need chocolates... Do u need ANYTHING AT ALL...!!!!!!! ... blah blah blah.... and more blah...." (All in one breath... phew!)
This went on till i yelled, all irritated (We don't like being told what to do, do we? ;-) ) -
"Will you stop worrying Pappa... We are not kids! Come onnn!".. No sooner the words were outta my mouth i regretted it, for i knew 'The Feeling'... The feeling of seeing your loved ones go. Cos it was not just him, those feelings... mutual... exactly mine! I saw his face drop as he said the typical parenty super-touchy one-liner..
"You will always remain my little girl!" ...Why do they do that...!!! It's hard not to well up after that. One cliche statement which no matter how many times, how many parents utter... always gonna be true to the core.
Well, that ended with a lotto emotional exchange and a long blast from the hooter. That bringing me to where i began... (Chug chug chug chug chug)... A moment is all it took for him to be OUT of sight and IN my thoughts... My mind eye sees him walking back the station, taking his steps ever so slowly. He's exhausted, i can see... Physically, mentally..! I know that face. That face is proof how much we mean to him, how much he loves us.
"Jaan chidakna"- That's what i call it.
As he totters out of the station, he knows he will wake up to a lonely 'Tomorrow', to see no wife on the other side of the bed, he knows he ll make one cup of tea - not two, he knows he ll think of her beautiful fresh morning face as he drinks it, he knows he ll not find his daughter smiling in her dreams as he looks into her room before leaving to work, he knows he wont feel the same energy in the office as always, he knows he will call them more than he always does for no particular reason, but to just listen to them. He knows this is not just tomorrow, but for many tomorrows to come before they come back. He knows his better half will worry about him, till she sees him again, and he reminds himself to not make it obvious to her that he wants her to come back home, soon! He knows his daughter will miss him very much, from the moment she caught his last glimpse, as she crained her neck to the maximum she could between the rails of the dirty window.
He is a man and men don't cry, he reminds himself as he wipes the one tear that has somehow escaped his strong eyes. He frames his last eye-snap he took of the mother-daughter duo, for keeps till he sees them again. His cell phone beeps and a little smile creeps on his face because he knows what it is. It's his daughter, as always, sending an
"I LOVE YOU PAPPA... I WILL MISS YOU MORE!" message. Thinking of his little girl, he joins the crowd which has god-knows how many widows, widowers, divorcees, orphans, childless, unfruitful and abandoned people. He feels lucky and thanks God for his wonderful family, as my mind eye shuts and drifts off to sleep... only to meet Him there, Again...! Amen.
