Thursday, March 1, 2012

On my birthday, twenty two years back...




   

        I struggled my way out of death,
       To come out and turn blue.
       I looked at their teary face,
       And i just knew... 
            I would always to 'em be true.




I did not open my eyes, but i knew it was dark around me. I had been hearing a lot of voices, totally muffled... for a while now. I did not understand what it was, or what it meant. Total confusion surrounded me. But there was one noise or voice i could relate with the best. It was kind, loving and soothing. It spoke to me all the time. I wanted to answer something back, but i couldn't. Did anyone even know i'm in here? I wasn't sure of my existence myself.

I wondered how long it would take before i could open my eyes. I was bored. I just floated about all day. There was one person who never left me alone. It wasn't long before i realized i'm within her. Must be the effect of the badams she ate everyday for me. I could think..! Day by day, the bond grew closer. I knew her routine. I knew when she was happy, and when she was sad. I knew when she was excited, and when she was stressed. But all i could do was feel. When she was happy, she told me nice stories. I tried imagining what she told me, but i did not know what she was referring to. I just knew it made me feel good.

Sometimes i did not feel good for no reason. Then i guessed she must be sad too. I did not like it when people made her sad. I did not like it when she worked with me inside. It stressed her, but she did it anyway. When she was sad, she shed tears. She thought she cried alone, but she forgot i was there too. Her tears frustrated me. I felt trapped. I wanted to get out and tel her everything is going to be alright just like that other person always told her. I realized that person must mean a lot to her. Cos he tried connecting to me too. He spoke to me a lot in the evening when he came back. But then he would go missing for hours together. I did not understand why he had to go, cos when he was around he made her laugh.. and that made me feel happy.

That day i could hear her sob, and i knew he wasn't around.. that good man. I was helpless. I was frustrated and i kicked! Immediately the sobbing stopped. I could feel something cupping against me from the outside. So i kicked again. There was a sense of happiness and excitement outside. It felt great. I kicked yet again. And i could feel the tearful smile that crept on her face. Since then, every time she felt sad, i knew how to make my presence felt. I just kicked!

This unspoken, unseen bond grew stronger over the time until it was that day. Twenty two years back on this day, i found my way to escape the darkness. I realized it was time. But something stopped me. She was in pain, and i had to get out soon to relieve her. The cord joining me and her, the tube i got my yummy stuff from had wound around my neck three times!!! I must have moved around a lot in there. Every time i tried getting out, the cord squeezed my neck and pulled me back into the cozy shelter i had spent 9 long months in.

Being the fighter that i am, i did not give up. I could not. I had to be fine. I couldn't let that good woman cry more. Nor did i want the good man to console her while he felt sad too. She screamed in pain, while i fought my way through death. Finally after a long day, and innumerous attempts i took my first breath, and opened my eyes. The miracle happened! I was alive! I looked at her pale sweaty face. The angel. Then and there i promised myself to be the strength she never had, to be the power she never gained, to be the happiness she never felt, to give her the life she never lived, to bring her the smile she would never wipe off her lovely face.

I kept looking until i was carried and cleaned, and handed over to another person. The way he looked at me, i just knew this was the good man. The one to whom i connected to without the need of an umbilical cord. Our connection was much deeper, we connected through the love in our blood. His face showed me what happiness really looks like. I have never seen a person more happier and proud. He beamed so much i had to close my eyes! Before i could open 'em again to see the whole beauty of the situation, something happened and i turned blue.

Lack of oxygen... That's what happened! All the squeezing around my neck turned me into a Blue Baby. Soon after replenishing me with just enough amount of oxygen, i was all pink and went blink, blink, blink! I became the talk of the hospital, the lucky Blue Baby who fought her way outta death. It was all worth the happy tears from her eyes as she held me close to her bosom, and he held her. Today after twenty two long years, it's the First of March. It's my birthday. A day which always begins with Mom and Dad narrating the whole dreaded cum happy experience and ends with lots of Thanks to God.

On this day, I'm so thankful for the life i've got, the people i've met, the lessons i've learned and the folks i'll meet. For the friends i haven't met, Cheers!



       


23 comments:

  1. a beautiful attempt to describe the first thought of a child who has just stepped into the world... :)
    wish you a very-very happy birthday... GOD bless u... :)

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    1. Hey... thanks a lot buddy!
      I wonder if those were really my thoughts back then... :)
      Cheers!

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  2. putti.lovely.it amazes me n inspires me that u accept and celebrate life thus.yup.miracles are all around us. we just need to feel n believe n they will happen.amen n god bless.

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    1. Hey Jo... thank u :) U kno ur one of the sources for all my inspiration.. but miracles.. yeah... M neva gonna stop believing in em! My life began with one :)

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  3. Happy Birthday Pranita - your story is so womderful and also inspirational .. glad i read this first thing in the morning !! god bless you !!

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    1. Thank u so much Sangeeta... :)
      M glad u liked it..
      Cheers!

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  4. Nice and let me tell one thing that it not my hobby to post comment on other blogs but you written it very well so i made up my mind to post comment.
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  5. that was so subtle . . . and u wouldnt be the only one to have suffered during those moments . . the eager eyes of the doctors and the nurses would have had a hell of a time filled with apprehension too ! trust me i know it well being a doctor myself :)

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    1. My mom tells me, the minute my mom delivered, the doctor just ran away from the place crying.. she was very experienced, but had never encountered a case like mine n l8r she tol my parents she hadnt noticed the cord around my neck in the scans or els she wud hav gone for a caesarean! She was more relieved than my parents they said! :)

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  6. Firstly I bump into your blog when I see"Pranitha blogs from Manipal". My place. My cherished native. Yes Iam a manipal brought up girl.

    Secondly your post was so unique and nice. Good job.

    Cheers
    Sush

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    1. Hey Sush... welcome to Miracles Happen!
      Glad to know you belong from here too...
      Thank you so much for the compliment... always my pleasure! :)

      Cheers!

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  7. First of all.. belated wishes for your b'day.. I hope you had fun.. Second.. guess this is one of the beautiful article I read offlate. I couldnt stop smiling throughout the post.. simply beautiful.. :)

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    1. Thank u sooo much for the wishes Haritha... :) I did hav an amazing tym!

      M sooo glad i have fellow bloggers like you who share n understnd my journey like their own... Thank u :)

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    2. After all these days, I now realized the fact that you are from Manipal.. that makes us kinda neighbours sinceI am from Mangalore.. :)

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    3. Wow... really? Niceee.... m stayin in manipal... but basically m frm mangalore too... :) :) :)

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  8. Wow! I loved every detail of your description!!! :) Simply beautiful Pranita:)And belated Birthday wishes to you!Hope you had a blast!! :)

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    1. Thank u so much for the wishes love...
      M glad u loved it...! :)

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  9. Also I love the new sunrise pic on your blog! Truly serves the "Miracles Happen!" purpose! :D

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    1. I recently clicked it on a trip to a beach nearby... It felt apt for the blog... :) It's sunset by the way ;)

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  10. this was your most moving post Pranita. the way you relived the whole experience through your narration. god bless you and your parents and a very happy (belated) bday :)

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    1. Thank u so much Sujatha... :) I feel very lucky on every bday and it always strengthens my beliefs that Miracles Happen!!!

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  11. sucha touching post pranita,i do hope your mother reads it:)very touching

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    1. Hey Alka... thanks much yaar... she did read it..! She's the most regular follower of my blog.. hehe... She loved it... Though dad-mom's always like anything we do! They ll like even if i write crap! ;)

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