Monday, April 16, 2012

Don't go, be alive - A Haiku.





Scream howled through the hall
People outside impatient 
Operation light

Red to green it goes 
Man hurries to still closed door
Expect joy or death

Nurse comes over with
Little baby boy in hands
Life into being

Still sad faces loom
Man looks beyond to wife pale
No breath, not alive

You're so precious
You're so important
Don't go, be alive!


This Haiku is written for The Heights of Haiku - April 2012. The prompt for today is 'BEING'.


25 comments:

  1. I take a bow! I actually felt i was watching this!!

    To tell you the truth, i started to write a post about the same thing, long back.
    But i couldn't do it because i knew not how to put it in poetic form. So i dropped the thought!!

    But this is absolutely great! I almost envy you for this poem! :D ;) :)

    great work..the emotions are reached, calm and intense!

    thanks for this!!

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    1. long back,i meant to say a few months back..
      but i now know even if i did write, i couldn't have done it this good!!!!

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    2. Thanks a lot Jayanth... frankly after i was done writing it, i thot i hav nt been able to convey the real feeling behind it since i had to do it in as less words!

      But m really glad the emotions came through!

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    3. believe me, it did more than just 'convey'...
      the theme is such raw and elemental that i guess we feel apprehensive about writing it.. i gave up..you din't and a great poem we have here.
      :)

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    4. I'm sure ur draft would be way better than my published version yaar!!! I think u shud give it a shot... Really... do it! :)

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  2. This was an exceptional one by you Pranita...I dunno what to say...I'm stunned... :O
    a really touching one... :)

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    1. Thanks a lot Sarabjeet! :) I'm glad the emotions came through.. wen i chose this theme, i wasnt sure whether i ll be able to do justice to it!

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  3. Beautiful.. a well narrated sad tale..or let me say.. a tale of mixed feelings.. I invite you to some time have a look at a post of mine " The beginning"..one of my longest poems... you will like it... I see some similarity of essence here.. RS:)

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    1. Thank you Ramesh ji... m surely gonna take a look at it.. for sure!

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  4. If the baby died, then this is a sad tale ~ Nice one ~

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    1. The baby lives... the mother dies!

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  5. You've told a whole story in haiku. Impressive!

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  6. Poignant poetic tale! Really...really nice:)

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    1. Thanks Tarang! Glad u liked it! :)

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  7. This is a wonderful series of haiku Pranita. Thank you for sharing.

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    1. The pleasure is all mine :) cheers!

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  8. Very touching story....beautifully penned

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  9. sad and sweet all at once what an endearing Haiku.

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  10. Very intense and suspenseful - I LOVED it! :)

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